Who Nose Where The Nose Goes?
by Kimiki
Summary: Have you ever noticed that the noses of several characters just dissappear during episodes? Two teenage girls have, and they are suddenly given the quest to discover the strange meaning behind it all.
1. Microwaves, Computers, And Empty Chairs

**Author's Notes**: Wow. This story has taken forever to get back... Long story short, I had it, lost it, stole it back from my beta (who I thank for keeping all the copies of her betas!), rechecked it, almost lost it (damn storm!), then uploaded it, then saved it. All in all, it has been very hard to get this fic back out... But, here it goes!

But, really, this fic isn't supposed to be serious. The characters don't even appear all that much... And this was my first WHR fic, so…that ought to explain it all right there… _(I also don't know all their names… And I've seen all the episodes! How sad!)_

_(Sighs)_ Guess I need to do this…

**Disclaimer**: Wow. You mean that for a minute you thought that I actually **OWNED** WHR? What drugs are you on?

**Summary**: Ever notice that, during a WHR episode, the character's noses just kinda DISAPPEAR? Well, Jenny and Sarah have, and they are determined to solve the mystery!  
**_THIS IS A FIC THAT IS NOT MEANT TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY!_**

**Warnings**: Eh? In the prologue thingy? None… Unless you have something against smoking microwaves and tortilla chips, then you shouldn't read. But other than that…

Oh, and just FYI:

"WORDS" (equals) talking

'WORDS' (equals) thinking

**(o)(O)(o) **(equals) beginning / ending scene

**_WHO NOSE WHERE THE NOSE GOES?_**

****

PROLOGUE: MICROWAVES, COMPUTERS, AND EMPTY CHAIRS

**(o)(O)(o) **

"Sarah! Witch Hunter Robin © is on now!"

"Really? Let me get this fat cat offa me!" Lifting her large cat off her stomach, the brown haired girl with bright, impish green eyes walked out of her room and into the hallway. Smelling smoke, she sweatdropped and yelled to her friend, "Jenny? Are you TRYING to cook? Again?"

"Uh… Well, you see…" Jenny started, coming into the living room. Her short blonde hair was pulled back into a loose bun, her usually kittenish gray-blue eyes pleading with her best friend to not yell at her. Behind her, smoke was exiting the microwave, the poor beeper going off like crazy. Walking past the slightly younger girl, Sarah opened the microwave door, covering her nose and mouth from the large cloud of smoke that rolled out the now-open door and into her face. Grabbing the container of day old Chinese food, Sarah put it in a pot full of water that was soaking in the sink. Turning, Sarah saw Jenny sneak off with a bag of tortilla chips and just shrugged. Walking into the living room, Sarah grabbed the chip bag from Jenny's grip and plopped down onto her sofa. Watching the anime, the two girls kept up a running conversation…

"Amon…" Robin said on the TV.

"It's your turn to do the dishes." Jenny stated, mimicking Robin's voice.

"I know what Michael's doing all the time!" Sarah exclaimed as the character typed rapidly on his computer.

"What?" Jenny asked, turning away from the screen to look behind her and at her grinning friend.

"He's looking at porn! What else?"

"Ya know… that makes sense…"

"I know… he's always glued to the screen and — AHHHH!"

"AHH?" Jenny asked, quickly looking at the TV, but had just missed what had caused her friend's outburst. "'AHH!' what?"

"Michael's nose just disappeared!" Sarah exclaimed, pointing accusingly at the TV. Sweatdropping, Jenny turned around in time to see a noseless Robin.

"AHHHH!"

"That's what I said!"

"What's wrong with it!"

"I don't know! Maybe there's a witch that steals noses?"

"Impossible… isn't it?"

"Of course not!" Sarah scoffed. "I mean, c'mon, there was a witch that TRIPPED people! So, there very well could be a witch that steals noses!"

"We need to get to the bottom of this!" Jenny exclaimed, jumping up excitedly out of her chair. Blinking at her, Sarah asked, "How?"

"By using the internet! It can solve anything! C'mon!"

Running into Sarah's father's office, both girls stared at the screen while Google © loaded. Sitting down determinedly, Jenny typed 'Witch Hunter Robin - Noses' into the search engine and hit 'ENTER'. After five seconds, the page was displayed with only one finding: 'WITCH HUNTER ROBIN: The Interactive World.' Shrugging, Sarah told the blonde, "Go ahead and click it. Might as well see if it has any info." Nodding, Jenny clicked on it once and blinked when a white screen appeared after a few moments. Slowly, black lettering appeared, dripping like ink down the page. Reading aloud, Jenny said to herself, Sarah and the quiet house, "Ye have entered the haven of all witches. Ye who are of noble blood and birth, enter. Ye all with naught, flee." Scratching her head, the girl said, "Well, that's cryptic."

"Click enter." Sarah said, pointing to the button that had appeared on the page. Following her orders obediently, Jenny double-clicked the button and gasped when she was pulled out of her seat. Looking down, Sarah yelled, "Jenny!" when she saw the empty chair.

**(o)(O)(o) **

Ehh… Yeah. Sorry about the crappy cliff-hanger if you can even call it that…

_(coughs)_

Yeah. Reviews are my friend (s). And, to quote Linkworshiper, "Flames will be flipped off with service and a smile".


	2. 1: Disguises, Missions, And Old Farts

**Disclaimer**:I am Kimiki. I own WHR. I rule the world. What? Haven't you ever played 'Truth, False, False'? Well, it's in that order if you haven't…

**Summary of the past chapter**: Well, seeing as how it was the prologue thingy... But, established the characters, the main plot thingy, and that this fic is **_NOT MEANT TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY!  
_**

**Summary of this chapter**: Find out where Jenny disappeared to! What? The computer can talk? Sarah and Jenny enter WHR-ville, they get their assignment and Jenny gets hit on by an old man?

**Warnings**: Well, none that I can find. Unless you got something against… uh… me. Cuz, that's the only thing that I would warn you about. Can't find anything that I would think anyone would find offensive… OK… I'll shut up now…

And just for your information...:

"words" (equals) speaking

'words' (equals) thinking

(words) (equals) computer speaking

**WHO NOSE WHERE THE NOSE GOES? **

CHAPTER ONE: DISGUISES, MISSIONS, AND OLD FARTS

**(o)(O)(o)**

Blinking at the now-empty chair, Sarah muttered, "What am I gonna tell everyone? 'Yeah, she was in the chair, but then, _POOF_, she disappeared!' Like they'll believe me…"

Sighing, Sarah slumped into the chair, her hand hitting the mouse button, causing the mouse to click once more on the 'enter' button. Gasping, Sarah felt the strange sensation of being pulled from her chair and away from all her surroundings. Standing, she blinked and felt something attach itself to her back. Staggering at the new weight, she was able to hear what the thing was saying.

"Sarah!IwassoworriedandscaredwhenIsuddenlycamehere!Wherearewe?Doyouknow?Howdowegetout?IwannagoHOME!"

"Uh… Jenny?"

"Yeah?" the girl blinked through her tears.

"Mind un-glomping me?"

"Oh! Sorry… I was just scared. Where are we?"

(In the computer)

"Oh! Well, that solves that question!" Jenny said. After a beat, the blonde looked around and asked, "Who said that, by the way?"

(I did)

"And who are you?" Sarah asked.

(The computer)

"Really? Strange…" Jenny commented before asking, "Can you send us back?"

(Negative)

"Oh. Why not?" Sarah asked, disappointment being overcome with curiosity.

(You must complete a task)

"Why do I have a bad feeling about this?" Jenny mumbled before Sarah shushed her. Looking up, the brunette asked, "And what task do we have to complete?"

"Bring me a shrubbery!" Jenny mumbled before Sarah hit her on the arm.

(What use would I have of a shrubbery? No. You must find the witch responsible for stealing all the noses on Witch Hunter Robin)

"So, there is a witch stealing the noses?" Sarah asked.

(Yes. There is speculation on it anyway…)

"Okay! When do we start?" Jenny asked.

(Now)

"Wha?" both girls said before the emptiness disappeared and two-dimensional buildings took their place. Blinking, both girls sweatdropped as the computer slowly transformed the buildings into 3-D graphics, a little progress bar appearing on the ground below them.

After the wait, the computer told them, (You are not to tell anyone of your mission. You will also be given a disguise so that you blend in. Good luck)

"Uh… Thanks?" Sarah said as a tingling sensation began at her feet and spread rapidly through her body. Closing her eyes, she quickly opened them when she heard a thud.

"Jenny?" she asked.

"What the HELL am I wearing! And, why the HELL do I have boobs! And my hair isn't SUPPOSED to be THIS blonde!"

"Well, we're anime… so… We're 'perfect'…" Sarah explained as she ran her fingers through her wavy hair. She was wearing a pair of plain, black baggy jeans with a camouflage shirt that said 'You can't see me, I'm hiding' in orange lettering. She had army boots on and a leather, ankle length trench coat over all of it. Looking down at Jenny, Sarah sweatdropped as the girl flipped her hair over she shoulder angrily. The blonde was wearing a tight, black muscle tank and green, baggy cargo pants that had chains through some of the belt loops. She was wearing combat boots and had a leather trench coat much like Sarah's, except hers had a slight slimmer trim to it, and not as many pockets on the outside. Glaring at her chest, the blonde asked, "Did I ASK for you? NO! Then why do I have you?"

Shaking her head, Sarah placed her hands in her coat's pockets and felt cool metal touch her finger tips. Pulling the object out, Sarah saw that it was a gun with orvo bullets. Shivering because she knew what orvo was made out of, she placed the gun back in her pocket and withdrew a worn, leather wallet. Thumbing through the notes, the girl guessed that she was roughly a millionaire. Well, at least they wouldn't have to worry about money while they stayed here…

"Sarah?" Jenny asked.

"Yeah?" she answered.

"Where should we start?"

"Do you know how to hack?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"Good. Let's 'borrow' some files from our friends-who-don't-know-us at the STN-J."

"Sounds like fun."

**(o)(O)(o)**

"But sir! We need a room! Please!" Jenny pleaded with the guy behind the hotel's counter. After the reception boy had refused to give them a room, Jenny had asked to present her case to the manager. So, now they were here, arguing with the balding guy who kept repeating himself.

"No reservation, no room!" the manager said once more, in his foreign Arabian accent. Growling in exasperation, Jenny told him, "But we're willing to pay!"

"…You are?" the balding 50-some-odd old man queried. Facial expression changing rapidly at the suggestiveness in his voice, Jenny quickly bowed to the two behind the counter, saying a quick, "Oh, uh, thanks for your time. Gotta go, uhm, have tea with my uncle's friend's cousin!" Grabbing Sarah by the arm, the blonde booked it out of the building. Once they were outside the hotel, the manager turned to the reception boy and told him, "Works every time… I don't know why…"

As they exited the building, Sarah's brain caught up with her body and she threw her weight backwards, succeeding in stopping Jenny from running into the oncoming traffic.

"Ahh!" Jenny yelled as she was pulled backwards, successfully stopping her fall by falling on… Sarah. Looking behind her, she asked, the girl, "Sarah, why are you on the pavement?"

"Good question. I'll hire an investigation committee to let you know in a few months."


	3. 2: Muggers, Hunters, And Hackers

**Author's Note**: Want to dedicate this chapter to my beta, just because I can. (That, and when I first posted this, it was her 16th birthday... Now, she's going on the big 1-7! _(grins)_ Lurve ya Sarah!)

**Disclaimer**: Yes, I own WHR, just like I own Inuyasha, Rurouni Kenshin, Outlaw Star, Trigun, Gundam Wing… Yet, I have no money. How does that work?

**Summary of the last chapter**: Jenny and Sarah got transported to WHR-ville and were given anime disguises! An old fart hit on Jenny, and the two girls need a hotel. Why, you may ask? Well, you'll find out in this chapter!

**Summary of this chapter**: Sarah and Jenny get mugged? And what's this? The STN-J thinks that they're witches! And Jenny's a hacker! This fic keeps on getting weirder and weirder…

**Warnings**: Don't say that I didn't warn you! Cuz, here I am, warning you! I use some cuss words in here! So, if you just can't handle that sort of stuff, get over it ya big baby. You live in the real world, contrary to popular belief.

"WORDS" (equals) talking

'WORDS' (equals) thinking

**(o)(O)(o)** (equals) beginning / ending scene

**_WHO NOSE WHERE THE NOSE GOES? _**

CHAPTER TWO: MUGGERS, HUNTERS, AND HACKERS

**(o)(O)(o)**

Walking down the alleyway, Jenny wondered why Sarah had chosen to come down this way. Along the brick and concrete sides of the buildings, dumpsters overflowing with garbage and cardboard boxes made into tiny homes were scattered around. Running a bit since Sarah had moved quite a few feet away from her, Jenny latched onto the older girl's left arm, asking her, "Why are we back here? We could get mugged."

"We won't get mugged." Sarah assured her, freeing her poor arm from the blonde's death grip. Flexing her fingers in an attempt to get the feeling in her hand back, Sarah gulped when she felt a sharp object press into the small of her back.

"Ya money." a gruff voice told her. Somehow getting her suddenly dry mouth to work, Sarah asked him, "What about it?"

"Han et ov'r." a slurred voice said from behind Jenny. Jumping, the blonde felt an arm snake over her shoulder and rest on her chest. Suddenly, the blonde's vision turned red when the offending hand squeezed one of her breasts and the man slurred in her ear, "How d'ya feel 'bout older men sweetie?"

Growling, Jenny quickly bent her knee, kicking as hard as she could behind her. Shocked, the drunken man dropped his arm from across her body in favor of covering his now-probably-bruised little man.

Staring at his fallen comrade, the man behind Sarah forgot that he was SUPPOSED to be mugging the brunette. Taking advantage of his sudden defenselessness, Sarah grabbed a trash can lid and hit the mugger upside the head while Jenny kicked her would-be molester in the head. Once both men were successfully knocked out, Sarah bent down and picked up her mugger's "weapon".

"A butter knife! What the FUCK!" Sarah yelled.

Smoothing her slightly wrinkled clothes, Jenny blinked when she heard some far off voices through Sarah's long stream of curses that would make even the worst anime villain blush.

"So, they ran down this alleyway?"

"Yes. There are two of them. One has a knife, the other smells of sake. Very dangerous."

"Anything else?"

"Yes. They're both wearing black trench coats."

Looking between herself, the two guys and Sarah, Jenny came to the conclusion that the muggers could fit the description. 'Cept, now she and Sarah could ALSO fit the vague descriptions. That creep had breathed on her enough to make her smell like she had been drinking for the past two days straight. And it certainly didn't help matters that Sarah was kicking the muggers with the butter knife in her fist. Sweatdropping, Jenny placed a hand on her friend's shoulder, telling her, "Sarah, we need to get out of here."

"Why?" the girl asked while kicking the perverted drunkard some more.

"Hey! I think they went down this way!" a voice called out definitively. And one that sounded awfully familiar… "Ms. Karasuma, cover me!"

"CRAP!" Sarah exclaimed, dropping the knife and grabbing Jenny by her coat collar, dragging the girl down the alley.

Only a few seconds later, the two hunters came upon the two unconscious guys. Bending down, the woman examined them and said, "These two look like they got caught in the middle of a bad situation. They're just bystanders." Picking up the discarded knife, she said, "I can't get anything from it. Must have not had it long enough."

"Duh! I only had it for five minutes tops!" Sarah whispered.

"Did you hear something?" the guy asked, suddenly looking around the alley. Clamping her hands over Sarah's mouth to keep the girl from talking any more, Jenny anxiously watched from around the corner of the wall that they were behind. The alley they were hiding in just so happened to be a dead end, so they REALLY didn't need to be found and mistaken for a pair of witches. But at the sound of approaching footsteps, Jenny felt her heart jump into her throat and lodge itself there. Right as he was going to turn to look down their alley, a voice crackled over his cell phone. Grabbing the device, he asked, "Yeah, what is it Michael?"

"Send me a picture of the two victims. I'll see if they're witches."

'Duh!' both girls mouthed, but they jumped when the guy took another step towards them and said, "Kay, just a second."

Flipping his phone over so he could take a picture, the Rookie (as Jenny and Sarah so lovingly knew him) sent Michael a picture of the two unconscious guys. Turning his phone back over to its normal position, the girls heard the hunter ask, "So? What's the result?"

"Uhm, those ARE the witches we're after." Michael told them. Sweatdropping, Jenny and Sarah waited for 15 slow and torturous minutes to pass. By that time the factory workers, who loaded the two witches into the van, had replaced the hunters. After driving off from the alleyways, the factory van left behind the two girls in the alley. Watching it drive away onto the main road, the brunette said, "Well, let's get to our hotel!"

**(o)(O)(o)**

After getting to the "Git 'N Scram Hotel", both girls went into the room that held all the computers. Paying for an hour, Jenny sat in front of the monitor and switched the computer from 'off' to 'on'. While waiting for it to load, the blonde asked, "So, you want me to find the files?"

"Yeah. And any other info that we may need."

"Kay." the blonde said as she over rode the computer's settings. Motioning behind her, Jenny instructed the brunette, "Take care of that, will ya?" Looking behind her, Sarah spotted a camera and nodded. Pulling a chair underneath it, the girl repositioned it so the camera was pointed to look out the window. As a second thought, the brunette even adjusted the lens so that the image would be blurred. Walking back over to the blonde hacker, Sarah sweatdropped as she saw the pages of files already printing and Jenny playing Spider Solitaire. Placing her hands on her hips, the older girl asked, "What are you doing?"

"Playing Spider Solitaire. You?"

"Didn't we pay for an hour?"

"Yeah." Jenny moved her 8 and found that she had no more possible moves. "Crap!" Looking over her shoulder, she asked, "Why?"

"Move over! I'm playing!" Sarah demanded, taking over the computer and starting a new game. "Top Score, here I come!"


	4. 3: Dancing Turtles, Conversations, And M...

**Disclaimer**: Uh… Seeing as how I spent all my money on playing Dance Dance Revolution ©, don't sue me… I'm poor, and my legs hurt… (sighs)

**Summary of the last chapter**: Well, Sarah and Jenny were peacefully walking down an alleyway, almost got mugged, beat off their muggers, then almost became mistaken for a pair of witches and had to run from Sakaki and Karasuma. What's this? Jenny has hacking skills? You would never have known…

**Summary of this chapter**: Why do I do this? You could just read this and get by… (sighs) Michael makes an appearance! And The Chief! And Robin! They find out that they've been hacked into! Then, Sarah tricks Jenny into hacking into the STN-J… AGAIN!

**Warnings**: Okay. If you are against illegally obtaining information from an organization, then you should just leave this fic now. Because, with out the whole hacking thing, this fic ain't gettin' nowhere. So, yeah. I warned you. Oh, and if you can't stand dancing reptiles, just jump ahead to the next chapter. You should be able to (somewhat) follow the storyline.

"WORDS" (equals) talking

'WORDS' (equals) thinking

**(o)(O)(o)** (equals) beginning / ending scene

**_WHO NOSE WHERE THE NOSE GOES? _**

CHAPTER THREE: DANCING TURTLES, CONVERSATIONS, AND MORE HACKING

**(o)(O)(o)**

Sitting at his computer, Michael contemplated his life at the STN-J. Okay, just make that his life. He didn't do anything BUT the STN-J! Sighing, he pulled up his files on all the current witches. Blinking, he tried to convince himself that he was seeing things. There couldn't be a small turtle dancing on his computer screen! Clicking on the 'cha-cha'-ing turtle, the animation stopped and what looked like a speech bubble appeared above the reptile's head.

"'HI!'" Michael read, "'Thanks for all your help! Bye!' What is that? 'Thanks for the help?' What?" Looking at his files, the nerd stood out of his chair rapidly when he saw that all the names had been messed with! Now they all read, 'Wah Wha Wah. Call the Wah-mbulance!' Pulling up all the other files that he had for the STN-J, Michael found that the file for all the current witches was the only one that had been tampered with. But, who had wanted to hack into that SPECIFIC file? And why did they want it? And why did they make it known that they had the information? Shaking his head, the computer geek sat back down in his chair and commenced trying to get all the information back.

**(o)(O)(o)**

"So, now that we have the info, what do we want to do with it?" Jenny asked as she flipped through the thick stack of pages. After having to reload the printer two times, the files had been completely printed, but now they had to go through the long list of names! Looking up from her game of Spider Solitaire, Sarah asked, "What? You mean that you don't know where to start?"

Hitting her forehead with her palm, the blonde muttered, "No. You were the one who suggested it, so I thought that you knew…"

"Nope! Not a clue! Ha! I win!" Sarah exclaimed as she won another game. Now the score was… 57 to 3…

"Good job Sarah. You've won three out of 60! What's that? Less than 5 percent?"

"Shut up! You stole files! I don't have to listen to you! You're a bad person!" the brunette pouted, crossing her arms and glaring at her standing friend. Sighing, Jenny dropped the stack of papers on the desk and pulled up one of the plastic chairs.

"Well," she stated, "It looks like we're gonna be here for a while…"

**(o)(O)(o)**

"So Michael, the files were like this when you found them?"

"Yes Chief." the guy told the balding man. Looking through the chaos, the chief mumbled, "Wonder why they wanted the information…?" Standing, he turned to Michael and asked, "And you can't find a link or ANYTHING to where they might be located?"

"None. The only evidence they left behind was the dancing turtle…" Here, Michael motioned to the icon that was now doing the disco, "And the change in text…"

"What's wrong Michael?" Robin asked as she walked towards Michael and her supervisor, Styrofoam coffee cup in hand.

"Oh, hey Robin." Michael said. "Someone hacked into my computer and I don't know who…"

"Did they leave behind any information?"

"Other than the boogying turtle? No."

**(o)(O)(o)**

"What do you mean, you want me to get on again!" Jenny yelled. Jeez! Did Sarah not KNOW ANYTHING!

"What? Can't you?" the girl asked from her cowering position under the desk.

"Yes, but it's a matter of us getting caught! They should know by now that someone hacked into their system, so they'll be extra cautious and be watching the system! So, it'd be STUPID to go and try and get some more information!"

"But we need it! It's not like we can just get onto google and type in our question… Well, we could, but we probably wouldn't get an answer…"

"Let's just look though all the papers, okay?" Jenny sighed, even though she sounded like she wasn't all to thrilled at the idea. Sensing her reluctance, Sarah pounced with,

"But, if they know that you know that they'll be extra cautious, then won't they be slack in security because they won't expect you to try for any more information?"

"Possibly…" Jenny admitted. Not pausing for a second, Sarah countered,

"So, if you know that they know that you know, shouldn't you try for the information, ya know?"

"What?"

"No. 'Yes'."

"Huh?"

"I agree."

"I don't follow you…"

"Because I'm not leading you."

"Leading me to what?" by now, the blonde was thoroughly confused.

"You're the hacker. You find out!"

"Find out what!" Jenny yelled.

"The information!"

"On what?"

"If there's any sort of witch out there in "Japan" that could have done this!"

"Oh, that?"

"Yeah. You can't find it, can you?"

"Yes I can!"

"I don't believe you." Sarah said while not quite believing that it was working out so well. She hadn't expected it to be THIS easy to fool Jenny…

"I'LL PROVE IT!" the girl exclaimed, overriding the computer system again and hacking into the STN-J's files. Looking over her shoulder, Sarah made sure that the camera was still pointed out the window, watching the chess tournament outside. Man, those old farts were gonna get toasty if they didn't find the sun block soon!

"Got it." Jenny stated, cracking her knuckles. Looking at the monitor, Sarah saw that there were three witches that could have done this… and two were in the factory at the moment. So that left…

"Aha! We got you now, you witch!"

**(o)(O)(o)**


End file.
